How Do You Break Up With Someone Your Scared Of?
He seemed really nice at first, but after we started dating i realized how much of a temper he had. He gets really angry over stupid things and im tired of being the target, but im scared of how he might react if i break up with him. what should i do?
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break up with a friend or an adult around. make sure you don’t accuse him of anything. just tell him it isn’t working out. DON’T do it when you are by yourself.
I am in the exact same boat. Well first off, I can tell, let me guess, you do something wrong, such as hanging up the phone, talking to a certain person, or not listening to what he wants you to do causes the biggest fight alive? And when he does fight with you, he throws a fit, screams, cusses, screams at you to leave his house, to leave him alone? Sound familiar? Yes, I’ve been in the same boat, well actually I still am but it’s ten times worse than what you’re dealing with.
I’d say tell him you don’t think it’s working out, tell him you can’t deal with his anger issues, explain why you think it’s wrong the way he treats and yells at you, maybe he will decide to change for the good to stay with you, if he throws a big fit about you telling him you think that he’s too angry, and has a really bad temper, then he’s not good for you. He doesn’t want to listen to what you have to say, he wants everything to go in his way or the highway, if you get what I’m saying,
I’d say just talk too him, and see if he’ll change for you, to calm down on his attitude towards you, if not then I’d highly suggest that you leave him. Anger problems are the biggest downfall in a relationship, if you can’t get along, there is not point to be together.
Most likely when you break up with him, he will beg for forgiveness and promise of change. If you refuse, then he will start harrass you…waiting for you outside of school, outside of your home,calling you etc…
So what I am worried about is not about he lost temper when you break up with him, (as others said, you can break up with him with your good friend around or do it in a public place) it’s what he might do after the break up.
So tell your family and good friends about this violent guy and ask them to watch out for you….trust me, you will get tons of support.
If you’re afraid of the person you’re with, that’s not a good sign. I would do it as soon and quick as possible. If you are truly afraid of him, then maybe you shouldn’t do it in person. Usually I would say that people should break up with the other person face to face out of respect for that person. If you do want to break up in person, then go somewhere where other people will be around just in case it escalates and gets a bit out of control. Otherwise, I would call him and do it over the phone. That way is more personal than an email or text message, but gives you the peace of mind of not being right next to him.
Try and do it in a nice way, if you cantry face to face as email or txt may agrivate his anger more and he will probably want to ask you why so u will probs have to see him again anyway. Do it in public go to a cafe make sure you have a friend with you at a seperate table(just incase) and use pepper spray< you can make this pepper, salt ad either vinigar or vodka which eva you think will sting eye more place in a bottle wala.
Good luck hope this helps! Just stay calm try and show him you are not scared.
You diserve better than that!
I’d call him and do it over the phone: that way it’s a little bit more personal. He may lash out verbally but he can’t hurt you physically if he goes into a rage. Also, anytime during the break-up discussion, if he gets verbally abusive, you could just be like “See, this is exactly the reason why it’s over.” and then you can hang up.
It depends, is he physically abusive?
Is he verbally abusive?
The best thing to do if he is the type to get physical would be to tell him over the phone. But ddon’t blurt out it’s over. First talk to him. Tell him you don’t appreciate the way he is treating you and that you’ve had enough.
If he is the type to curse and emotionally abuse you, then meetup with him in person and tel him eactrly how you feel. Have a friend know where your going just in case.
Either way, and if none of these, make sure you do break it off wiht him. Whether he is one of these or none of these he’ll only get worse. Especially because you’ve mentioned he has already changed for the worse. If you are ever in an e emergency wehre he won’t leave you alone be sure to tell a parent.
I do believe, there is not a good recipe to end a relationship. Just be honest with yourself as far as if it is something you want to do. I read this article this morning about the questions you should ask yourself before breaking up. You might learn a few things. After the evaluation process, if you still want to break off, just go ahead and act fast, especially if you are scared.
Involve friends and family in your decision, so they know what is going on.
Good Luck
If you really want to do it face to face, which is a good idea becuase it will avoid the face to face AFTER it is done at some unplanned place (mall, restaurant, street) SOOO…. find a public like place to meet and have a friend be within seeing distance but unnoticed if possible, break up with him then and if something happens there is the public and your friend there to intervene.
Good luck and good job for seeing something you need to leave!
Contact an abuse shelter near you. If you email me your city I can help you find one. about a half hour after your b/f leaves for work have a friend or family member come over to your house. Pack your stuff and get out of there. Do not go somewhere he can easily find you. Either an abuse shelter or a friend or family member that he does not know where they live. You can leave him a letter letting him know the relationship is over and that he should not try to contact you. If you have a legitimate reason to fear him you can go get a protection order. Your local police station should be able to advise you on how to accomplish this. Do not call him as he will then be able to find you. Do not fill out a forwarding address card at the post office. Call all companies to cancel your accounts that go to his home and establish new accounts at a different address. Change your cell phone number. If you and he are on the same account (if it is in his name leave the phone behind) then you need to contact your cell phone carrier and get his name dropped from your account, change your number and your address. Seek professional help. Good luck and be safe.
I have been there but with women. I had a live in girlfriend for five years. We owned a home together. She was very hot tempered. I have no doors on my closets because of her temper. Yes she busted them off. She also tore up the bedroom doors, and other parts of my house pretty bad.
I wanted to break up because she was verbally abusive on top of violently tempered. But telling her I wanted to break up with her would set her off. Things would get thrown, and doors would get holes kicked in them. I didn’t want that. If I called the police again someone would end up in jail. Where I live they usually take the man, even if he is not the one that is being violent.
So I stopped having sex with her. I made her believe that I had lost all my sex drive. It took a few months, but it worked. She would lay on my bed naked, and make motions at me. I would just walk away. She broke up with me for lack of sex. I fooled her! So long as she thinks she broke up with me, then she had nothing to be angry about. I have done more than once with different women. It is very effective.
Just do something that will make him break up with you. Just pretend to like something he thinks is gross, or maybe tell him you decided you are gay or something. Anything is better then getting beat up, or killed.
Good luck;
Text him and tell him that he’s a whore, go on a rampage about how he’s cheated on you, if he invites you to his house, mess around with everything he doesn’t want you to mess around with until you find his secret stash of playboy porno, then walk out on him saying that you’ve dumped him- if he wants to beat you up- call the police and send him to juvi.
break up with him in a public place where he would be embarrassed to be loud and angry. make sure you let somebody know where you’ll be. if you are too scared for this, then i would call him and make it clear that you do not want to see him again, ever. do not give him any hope for a relationship with you or he may keep trying to contact you.
If you are truly worried for your safety, face to face would be a last choice. I would recommend doing it via a family relative or friend (One that can handle any retaliations). Let that person tell you the full extent of his reaction and if it seemed like tempers are going to flare. Avoid him at all costs, if he begins trying to find you just get somebody you know to warn him to back off.
Yeah, I’d break up with him over the phone. Dont do it in person because you may not know how crazy he is. People may say its lame to break up with someone over the phone or by e-mail or text… NOT ME! Thats way easier than doing it in person, especially if they have a bad temper. But get out of that NOW, there are waaaaay to many guys out there for you to have to settle with someone who doesnt treat you exactly how you want to be treated.
Don’t go alone and tell him face to face. You need to break up now because if you keep on with this guy it will only get worse. I married a man like this and I should of never married him. It doesn’t get any better. I am happily divorced and I am so happy I got out of it. No one should get abused my anyone.
Wish you the best.
P.S. Don’t do email or texting. It just shows that you are weak. Be strong and tell him to his face. Don’t let any man scare scare you. You will feel better once you do tell him to his face. Don’t be surprised if he says he will never do it again. He will only be lying to you. Don’t buy it!!!Be in a public place where people see you and hear you.
Edit: Kendra what an awesome idea. That was a good one. Thumbs up to you girl.
Make a phone call. The phone has a hang up button, say what you have to say, Like: It’s over. I don’t want to see you anymore due to your temper. and then hang up!!! Short and sweet. Block his number and never look back. If you’re truly scared, or he starts to harass you, have a restraining order put on him. And stay away!!! Don’t accept ANY phone calls, txt, or messages from him at all!!!! Good Luck!!!
i would go to police station saying you had some business there and then just be like”i’m breaking up with you. BYE” and then run as fast as you can ..lol…or you could have a friend wait for you while you guys break up…..ooooorrr text him that you’re over…that’s the cool new way to break up…he’ll get it if he keeps up with the world events
Do it in public because breaking up over the phone or email is very tacky and that might send him over the edge. But make sure your around loads of people. goodluck but you need to do it because his anger will only get worse the more use he gets of you.
You have to end this relationship in person. If you choose to email by phone or email he may try to get with you to fix th problem. If you tell him in person it is done. If you don’t feel safe, have some friends near by watching from a distance and they can come get you if things get weird.
yea email or call or something.. be like “i wanted to do this in person but im seriously scared of you” and then tell him u dont want him to be near u. if he does then get a restraining order or whatever its called. and tell him to do anger management classes or something
Get a Civil Escort from your local Police, tell them your scared of him and break up with him. He will get a clear message, your not in this alone. They will warn him to leave you alone, most bullies are frightened little boy’s them selves.
just try to do this quietly , and Explain that it’s nothing wrong with him and It’s you Not Him
Or there is another option that can take longer
start to Act in a Way that Makes Him BreakUp with You
I REALLY wish you Best luck of what you do
God Help You Dear
You shouldn’t ever be afraid of someone in a relationship. JUST break up with him. If it comes down to it, have someone close by while doing the break up. If he lays a hand on you, call me and I’ll come down and whoop his azz for ya
Break up with him in a public place. Or through email or text. Usually this is a crappy way to do things, but due to the guys temper, it may be the safest way to do it.
You just slip out the back, Jack
Make a new plan, Stan
You don’t need to be coy, Roy
Just get yourself free
Hop on the bus, Gus
You don’t need to discuss much
Just drop off the key, Lee
And get yourself free
ask a big friend to come over while you break it to him.
or you can give him a flying ninja kick to the throat and tell him you want to see other people.
answer mine! http://answers.yahoo.com/question/index;…
Call your local women’s crisis shelter. They are the experts on things like this, and will have some good advice for you! This is much too serious to undertake on your own, especially if you are frightened. Trust your gut.
Smart girl for reading the signs! Tell him his temper scares you and it’s time for you to move on. If your afraid, get a restraining order or have a guy friend tell him to leave you alone! Good luck.
If you are afraid of him then leave safely. Just go when he is not home. Do it the safest way possible. but please do it! and get some to help you maybe even the police.
What are you afraid of? His anger? His violence? If it’s the latter, do it somewhere where people can see you but not hear you